Joshua's Birthday

Joshua turned 5 on the 16th.  He is growing up so fast.  Here is a picture of his "hotwheels" cake.  And, yes...I had some.  lol.

Blog Award!

I got an award!  Thanks so much, Kim  You rock!  The first thing I have to do it to thank the person who gave it to me...Done!  The second part of this award is to write ten things that you love.
1.  God. He is my heavenly Father. 
2.  My son.  I am so blessed to have him.
3.  My husband.
4.  My parents.  I love and miss them so much.
5.  My sisters.   They are all so different from each other.  I am so proud of them.
6. My friends.  I don't have many...but, it's the quality...not the quantity that counts.
7. Sleeping late. I don't get to do it very often. lol
8. Fall...My favorite time of the year.
9. Clean clothes.  I love it when all of my laundry is done!  lol.
10. Homeschooling my son.  I am so lucky to be able to teach him.  He is so smart.

The third part is to pass this on to 10 other bloggers.

The Incredible Shrinking Family

Sandy's Search For Her Inner Skinny

 A Deliberate Life

Between The Before And After

Fat Girl With A Pretty Face

From Fat To Fab

From Fat To Fantastic

Life Time Plan

Becca's Weight Loss Struggles

 PCOS: Path To Health


I wanted to give this back to Kim...But, I didn't know if that was "allowed" or not.  SO...KIM...I LOVE YOUR BLOG!!

More Meds...

My doctor's office called this morning.  She changed my metformin from 1500mg to 2000mg.  She also put me on Tricor for my triglycerides.  We were hoping that my weight loss had helped...but, my trigs were still high.  So, I am on this Tricor for one month to see if it will help.  I skipped weigh in this week.  I just feel fat and bloated.  Maybe another period is on it's way.  I had one in April and skipped May.  The one in April was the first in many many months.  Maybe this increase in Metformin will help regulate me more. 

Food today was good.  I didn't go over my budget.  I worked 5 hours today.  Pretty physical job all day.  Lots of rooms to clean today.  I have been drinking lots more water the last week or so.  I am trying to wean myself off diet coke.  I had 3 today.  That may sound like a lot...but, I am used to having 6 or 7 a day.  BAD HABIT! 

I hope everyone has a good night.

Why Do I Do This??

I just did something that I'm not proud of.  And my body is letting me know.  I ended up eating leftovers from last night for lunch.  Which in it's self  isn't a bad thing.  But, the amount that I ate...therein lies the problem.  I ate and ate until the entire bowl was gone.  I started feeling full halfway through the meal. But, I didn't stop.  I don't really know why.  I just "had" to finish the entire thing.  Well...I got so sick.  I had to take lots of papaya enzyme tablets and 4 advil for the horrible headache I got.  My stomach was reeling and I felt like it was gonna come back up any minute.  I did think about just letting myself puke so that I would feel better.  But, I didn't want my husband to know that I had eaten so much...so, I didn't puke.  Besides, I hate puking! 

Well, it's been about 2 hours since I pigged out.  I can now lift my head off of the pillow and type on the computer.  It would not have been possible right after I ate.  I know that I am a food addict.  But, this kind of obsessive eating hasn't been a problem for me in the past.  That I can remember, anyway.  I always had a stopping point.  Maybe because now I am limiting myself to my calorie bank has made me rebel a bit. 

But, as much as I hated doing this to myself... I have to say... LESSON LEARNED!  I never want to feel that sick again.  Especially when I made myself sick.  I could have prevented the whole thing.  I just lost control.  But, I feel like I am back at the wheel now and I know which direction I want to go. 

Thanks for reading.  I feel better now that my stupidity isn't a secret anymore.

Food Log~ 6/07/10

Monday:

S~ granola bar  100

B~ bacon 160   egg w/ cheese 140

L~ ham and cheese sandwich  325

S~ yogurt  100

D~ mashed potatoes, pork  550

S~ yogurt 100

1475

Nothing exciting happening here today.   Just work.  Joshua and I went for a walk this afternoon.  The weather has been nice today.  I go have my blood drawn tomorrow.  So, I have to fast 12 hours.  Starting tonight.  I am gonna try to get a few more calories in before bed.  Maybe 100 more or so.  I am trying to keep them between 1500 and 1600.  Have a great night.

Weigh In Sunday...

This is what my BMI was in March:
35.86

This is what it is today:
34.45

I am still OBESE...but, it's nice to see that number going down.  Weigh in today was good.  I lost 2 lbs.   I am now at the point where I have trouble losing.  I weigh 220.  It has been hard for me to get under that number in the past.  BUT, this is now...that was then.  I will be under 220 next week.  I can't wait.  That number has been playing mental games with me for years.  I get down to 220 and for some reason... I stop trying.  Crazy, huh?  Well, no more.  Game over.

I hope you all have a great day.  It's rainy here.  Not sure what our plans are for the day.  I may have to work...  I did yesterday.  I will be back later to post my food.

Food Log~ June 4, 2010

Today I ate:


Breakfast

Chewy Granola Bar 100

Wonder Stoneground 100% Whole Wheat Bread  360
Hannaford Beef Bologna  220
Kraft Deli Select White American Cheese  80
Kraft Miracle Whip  40

Dinner

Betty Crocker Hamburger Helper Beef  300
Asparagus, Boiled  80
Corn 160

Midnight Snack

Kashi Island Vanilla     90
Wegmans Organic 2% Milk  130


 Calories: 1560

 I worked this morning.  Then after work...I got a long walk in...then I played catch with Joshua.  He is learning how to use a baseball glove.  We had lots of fun.  It was a great day. 

Moving Forward And Letting Go...

First of all...I want to say "thanks" to those who commented on my last post.  I didn't realize how much I needed to "know" that I didn't do anything wrong.  Just reading all of the comments really helped me get past that experience.  I am now ready to move forward and let go of all feelings that I was having.  Creepy Psycho Man can kiss off!  I'm not letting him ruin what I have worked so hard for.

I went to the dr. today for my 3 month check up.  I was leary of the scale.  It hasn't been my friend for many years.  But, I am happy to say that today it was nice to me.  I am down 16 lbs from my last visit.  I know I am not losing at lightning speed...but, Heck I am losing!  My dr. was so happy.  I still have a ways to go...but, today was a big motivation for me to keep keeping on.  I go have follow up blood work done on Tuesday of next week.  I hope to see better #'s than I saw 3 months ago.

My baby will be 5 on the 16th of this month.  I am freaking out.  He is getting so big!  And he is super smart.  He can pick up the newspaper and read the headlines to us.  lol. He wants a Lego cake for his birthday.  Last year it was Transformers.  The year before that it was Bob the Builder.  And the year before that he wanted Elmo.  lol.  I have pics of every cake.  I will be sure and post this year's cake for everyone to see.  He is so excited.  He keeps asking me "how many more days unitl my party?"   I am so blessed.

I am going to start posting my calories again tomorrow.  It was so helpful to me before.  I have let life derail me for too long.  I am moving forward again. :)